Deep Thought Of The Day:

I've been thinking about all the shopping mania that goes on in this country around this time of year. I feel strong urges to shop, but that because I am bombarded by advertising. On the other hand though, a look at my magazine rack will show you that I am a big fan of products. Two thirds of my magazines are about technology products. Nestled into the collection of magazines are a few catalogs. The catalogs, mostly for computer products and pro audio gear, are kind of pornographic in their own way. They are not magazines about products, they are just pictures of products.

My car is in the shop.

I am waiting for the mechanic to call me back and tell me how much longer the repair will take and how much more it will cost.

A wise person once told me, "There will be occaisions in life where you will be asked to grab your ankles. When those occaisions arrive, my only advice to you is to chomp on the leather bit which is in your mouth."

This is rough.

Hasidic Reggae Concert at Purchase College:
I got a graffitti guy to do the banner. Here's how it looked when he started:



And here is the finished product:

This guy is pretty talented.

Stronger Slogans:

I have decided to live my life by some of my stronger slogans, like:

What are we, old women?

and

Let's get the bacon delivered!

I was watching Fox News this morning:

They were talking with Dennis Ross about the Palestinian situation. Ross says, "So when Arafat went down in that plane crash in 1992, I said to Abu Ala, who was finance minister at the time, I said, 'If the chairman had not survived that plane crash, would you know where all the accounts are?' And he looks at me and says." And then they lost their satellite feed. The anchorwoman says something like, whoa, now I too am left hanging. But she was the person conducting the interview with Dennis Ross on the feed. Why couldn't she just tell us? Utter vacuousness. I turned off the TV and decided not to give it any more chances today. Well, maybe not all of TV. Maybe just Fox News.

Der Spiegel Online: Jesusland



Hilarious!

the mennu method finds a home!



Starting this Saturday Night

the mennu method will be

the resident DJ

at Talia's Steakhouse

on Amsterdam and 93rd Street.  



Come out and show your support.  No cover. 

A portait drawn by one of my all-time favorite students: Nadav Lipkin

Thanks, Nadav. You rock

Holy Floiven!

Been trying to post for two days now! Donno what's up with the blogfolks. Maybe it's the upcoming election that makes people want to rant a bit more and get the "issues" out into the blogosphere. Not so for me: silliness is always at the top of my agenda.

Lord of the Flies

This morning, as I was getting ready to shower up and get to work, I found a fly in my bedroom. I don't understand why there are flies in my apartment at this time of year. I suppose they live in the building, and survive on the remains of other living things and god-knows-what-else. Flies are not very zippy or active at this time of year, so I have little to no problem catching them. I've been catching flies since my army days, when I would while away the hours on guard duty accumulating a pile of dead flies near me. As the fly buzzed above the screen of my laptop, I swiped my hand in a "fly catching motion" and caught it. I shook my hand around and confirmed that indeed I had caught the fly. It's important to feel around for the fly. If you peek with your eyes, the fly will escape. I walked over to the bathroom, shook the fly in my hand to disorient it, chucked it into the toilet and watched it get flushed. With the hunt over, I was ready to proceed with my morning bathroom routine.

As I took my glasses case out of the medicine cabinet, I noticed that there was a fly on it's back near the place vacated by the case. "Is it dead?" I wondered. It was not dead, but almost dead. This fly was soon to leave the chorus and join the Choir Invisible. I tore off a piece of toilet paper, grabbed the fly, and flushed it down the toilet. "Humh. That's that," I thought, and started brushing my teeth.

I was not five strokes into brushing when I felt a fly on my calf. "Great," I thought, "another fly. I'll deal with you in a second, as soon as I finish brushing. Perhaps you did not see the carnage I have inflicted on your kind this morning, or perhaps you did. Maybe you are here for that very reason. Maybe you are trying to get my attention because of the rage and anger you feel over your powerlessness to pose an actual threat to me. You know what the end result of this interaction will be..."

When I finished brushing, I caught the fly, and flushed it, my third fly, down the toilet.

Mennu: 3 Flies: 0.

Not a good week for ol' Duder's car

So this is what I found on my way to work this morning. My window was punched out. There was nothing taken from the car, in fact, it doesn't seem that anyone even opened the car door or went in. On the positive side, my car was not used as a toilet, and nothing was taken from the car. This kind of thing has happened to me before, so I know where to go to get the window repaired. It was fixed within an hour, and for less than $40. I'm still left wondering why this happened.

Barfly:

I was thinking about a quote from the movie:

"Why did it have to be Eddie? He symbolizes everything that disgusts me. Obviousness. Unoriginal macho energy. Ladies Man..."

I like the protagonist's integrity. Sure, to the outside world he is nothing but a bum, and in almost every case, he does not care what you think of him. The protagonist still holds some people in a particular state of contempt, because their very being symbolize the antithesis of his personal beliefs. It seems that most people can't respect the integrity of a bum, but some people have done a lot of thinking, drinking and writing about this subject.

Here's a new one:

This morning I spilled a little coffee on my laptop. It wasn't a lot of coffee; it must have dripped from the bottom of my mug as I left my bedroom/computer room. I went out into the living room to chat with my roommmate and take a look at the view from the balcony. I like to see the morning sun glittering off the East River. It reminds me why I live here.

So I went back into my bedroom and saw the coffee stain on my laptop. Luckily the spill did not effect the keyboard or anything. It was an innocuous spill. I tore off a corner of a paper towel to clean it up and tried wiping the coffee off the machine. I got most of it off, but some of the coffee had congealed onto the casing, and would have to be treated with some moisture, like a schpritz of Fantastic or something. But I was in a hurry, and figured I would deal with it after showering and getting ready to get to work. So I took a shower.

When I returned to my bedroom the stain seemed to have hardened some more. And then, standing in my towel fresh out of the shower I got an idea. I took anther corner of a paper towel, gathered some moisture from my beard, and wiped the stain clean. It's the first time I have used beard drippings as a cleaning agent.

(OK. Now I really gotta get to work.)

Metronaps

Ever wish you could just plop down for a 20 minute nap? Now you can even while in midtown. Just go to Metronaps in the Empire State Building and recline in a pod. They'll even bring you lunch while you nap.


It's like the future!

Black People Hate Me and They Hate My Glasses
Short film. Long title. True story.

A waiter on a cigarette break unravels a frenetic, non-linear tale to his fellow co-workers in an attempt to explain why black people hate his glasses. The result is a zig-zagging ride down the New York City streets of the early 90's. A celebration of storytelling and astigmatism.

Cowboy Monkey Rides Dog In Show
You must see this. It's a monkey, dressed as a cowboy, riding a dog. You gotta love the internet. Where else would we be able to see monkey rodeo? A friend commented that it would be even cooler to have the monkeys dressed up like English knights and teach them to joust. I said that would be awesome. So he said, "especially when the loser, with the last ounce of his fading strength, shows ultimate monkey disrespect by flinging poo at the winner."

Bootleg Objects:
The ReBraun:

"Designed in 1962 by Dieter Rams, the "Audio 1 Kompaktanlage" is a milestone of german post-war design. It embodies, even more than its predecessor, the famous "snow-white's coffin," the design ideals of the rationalist "Ulm School." These sober paradigms of utility and matter-of-factness are playfully remodelled in the "ReBraun": Two TFT-Displays take the place of the radio scales, the lettering on the anodised front plate ironically quotes the lingo of the radio era. A randomly positioned button, labelled "Zufall" (Randomness) stands for the freedom from mechanical constraints. The antenna does not receive any FM radio, but is used to connect the system to the internet via Wireless LAN. The case and acrylic hood were lowered by several centimetres for sporty reasons (think: hot rod!), and the window that formerly contained a signal strength readout now becomes a tabernacle for the old Braun nameplate."

Mozilla Firefox: Browser of Choice: Department of Silly Things 2004

I've been using Mozilla Firefox as a browser: they have an extension called "firesomething" which randomly changes the name of the program each time you start it. It is an utterly useless and silly extension but it makes me laugh. If you do a keyboard shortcut Ctrl+` (grave accent) in the browser window, you get a new name.

Examples: Spacedonkey, Seafox, Firesquid, Waterwolf, Superkangaroo, Powerimpala, Moonjackalope...


Even better: why not download it for yourself? It's easy to use and filled with silly goodness!

Won't you pour me a Cuban Breeze, Gretchen? (Part II)

A critical examination of "The Goodbye Look"

Last night I dreamed of an old lover dressed in gray.
I've had this fever now since yesterday.
Wake up, darling, they're knocking, the Colonel's standing in the sun,
With his stupid face, the glasses, and the gun.

I know what happens,
I read the book.
I believe I just got the goodbye look.
Won't you pour me a Cuban breeze, Gretchen.

"The whole scene turns out to be a deja vu from some cheap spy novel. Yet later, while pondering a way out, the singer casually asks the German bartendress for another drink. This "why let imminent demise ruin a good vacation" attitude is quintessential Fagen. After all, life is only a movie, right? The only musical hint of calamity is the chorus melody, which sits tensely on a fifth straight through, while the chord progression beneath slithers through a series of knotted suspensions, never resolving until Gretchen delivers his Cuban Breeze.

The glib, relaxed guitar solo that follows evokes the gay, nonchalant ambience of the bar, reinforcing that at moments like these, one does what one can, Fate does what it will. Similarly, the chic, glamorous ambience of Rick's Cafe in the film Casablanca masks the tingle of intrigue in which a single misplaced glance can cost one's life. In such tightly wound dramas, emotions can only be read in extreme close-up, whether they be in Humphrey Bogart's eyes or Donald Fagen's vocal."

Click here for the rest of this silliness.

The Geek Test

Take the test!

I'm just the DJ

Monday, July 5, 2004:
I needed to escape East Quogue and hang out with some nice people. Like a refugee I drove over to Dune Road, where my hosts were delightful. They were jolly interested in hearing about the trials and tribulations of a beach house dj. I was pleased to be around people who were just plain nice. I went from a scenario where people would constantly harrass me with requests for things and songs and who knows what else, to more humane questions, and more generous offers.

"Would you like another cup of coffee?"

"Why, yes. I would love another cup of coffee, thank you."

After one hour of pleasantness, I was ready to return to battle.

(This picture was taken by Daniel Ginsberg, who is himself a kind and gentle soul.)

Right Thinking Girl: Love In A Time Of Danger: "The fight against terrorism isn't just happening in Iraq, Afghanistan, and other parts of the world. It's still happening here at home, in places like Virginia and New York City. It's being waged in the 3,000 families who aren't finished grieving over their loved ones and who will never be finished grieving. It's being waged every time a wife wakes up to the crying baby who will never know his father, and every time a man wakes up in a cold sweat dreaming that his wife jumped to avoid being burned alive."

Won't you pour me a Cuban breeze, Gretchen?:

THE GOODBYE LOOK (by Donald Fagen)

The surf was easy on the day I came to stay
On this quiet island in the bay
I remember a line of women all in white
The laughter and the steel bands at night

Now the Americans are gone exept for two
The embassy's been hard to reach
There's been talk and lately a bit of action after dark
Behind the big casino on the beach

The rules are changed
It's not the same
It's all new players in a whole new ball game

Last night I dreamed of an old lover dressed in gray
I've had this fever now since yesterday
Wake up darling they're knocking the Colonel's standing in the sun
With his stupid face the glasses and the gun

I know what happens
I read the book
I believe I just got the goodbye look

Won't you pour me a Cuban breeze, Gretchen?

I know a fellow with a motor launch for hire
A skinny man with two-tone shoes
Cause tonight they're arranging a small reception just for me
Behind the big casino by the sea

I know what happens
I read the book
I believe I just got the goodbye look

This is one of the most interesting essays I've read on the war in Iraq:

lgf: No One Asked Us: "...Watching politicians declaim and hearing television experts expound on why we went to war and on their opinions of those running the White House and Defense Department, I have one question.
When is someone going to ask the guys who were there?
What about the opinions of those whose lives were on the line, massed on the Iraq-Kuwait border beginning in February of last year? I don?t know how President Bush got the country behind him, because at the time I was living in a hole in the dirt in northern Kuwait.... "

The artcle is amazing!

How I make DJ CDs:

I take my 192 encoded music with good id3 tags, chuck a few folders onto a cd with easy cd creator, burn a disc, then drag and drop the finished disc into winamp, saving it as an m3u playlist, then closing winamp, I open the m3u file in mixmeister, which nearly crashes the computer. Mixmeister then examines the tracks, and determines the beats per minute (BPM) which is important when DJing. When it finishes this process, about 20 minutes, I can then save the playlist as .txt file which has title, artist, album, song length, BPM, genre...etc...then that .txt file gets thrown into a word processor, the list of trax gets numbered to correspond with the numbers on the CD, and any extra information or formatting is removed. I make three copies of each disc: two for the DJ system, one for the car, and a list of the tracks on the CD. I mark up the page with notes about the songs, and then put it into plastic page holders, which sit in a loose leaf binder. Fun, eh? I don't know any way to make it easier.

Tso What?: "General Tso's Chicken - fried boneless dark-meat chicken, served with vegetables and whole dried red peppers in a sweet-spicy sauce - is one the most common yet enigmatic dishes you will find on a Chinese menu. It makes you wonder: Who was General Tso? What was his association with chicken? Why in God's name is this dish (which even a culinary incompetent like me could probably make) listed as a 'Chef's Specialty' on most menus?"

And I thought that it takes a tough man to make a tender chicken. Apparently this is a synergy of a ruthless general from recent Chinese history, New York City and it's introduction to Hunan and Sechuan cuisine, marketing strategies and pure conjecture.

Moblog! So I just got a digital camera phone and am interested in setting up a moblog (mobile phone picture weblog). I am currently testing various services. During my search I came across this one: a weblog of home made bento boxes. I swear, this mother loves her children...

bento moblog: "I spend a small but significant piece of my weekday mornings making lunch boxes for my two children, just one of the many ephemeral everyday labors of domesticity. Here is my attempt to capture this stream of life, and to give me some hints on those days when I wake up uninspired. "

Wanna make art? Take a break from all the politics, sports and porn and try:
Mr. Picassohead

If it smells like Bayonne...leave it alone!

WSJ.com - Unmentionable City Is Still Left Waiting For Ship to Come In

Can't seem to get enough of Lynndie England...she should get a job on TV....

The Village Voice: Nation: Press Clips: Bitch Bites Man! by Richard Goldstein: "Say what you will about sexism in this coverage. It's definitely true. But there's another reason why England's face is so ubiquitous in the press. Many acts depicted in those awful photos resonate with certain erotic fantasies. To admit that images of forced sodomy and pyramids of naked men are arousing is to understand why guards can do such things when ordered to, and then smile for the cameras. But because these fantasies clash with acceptable sexuality, they produce revulsion. The media show just enough flesh to rivet our attention, while blurring the holes in the prisoners' rectums as a signal of what we need to repress.
But offer an image of a woman grinning at the humiliation of men and you allay any homosexual anxiety while tapping into the permissible kitten-with-a-whip fantasy. You can blame her for being unnatural even as you project yourself into her gaze. By fostering this reverie, the press helps to transform a horrible story into a source of pleasure. That's where Lynndie England comes in. She's not just the face of Torturegate; she's the dominatrix of the American dream. "

The Strange Case of the Shocker

As I read this article I am reminded of a similar incident when I was in high school.

Back in Frisch, we used to have a club called "The Upper Echelon Society." It was a silly group with the stated purpose of acquiring a hot tub for our school. We used to have "meetings" in the shower where members would wear ties and frequently say "harrumph." Each day a memo went out which was read and commented on by our officers. We put up banners in the school, had a flag, and even had two pages in the yearbook. Our school paper, The Stuggle, did a feature on the UES, and showed our coat of arms in the paper. Our coat of arms had an F in one corner, crossed golf clubs in the other, and picture of a hot tub with a crown over it, and our motto (a paraphrase of Julius Caesar):
"vidi, vici, veni"

Well, one day, a teacher was sitting in the lounge and reading the newspaper article and noticed the motto on the logo. When the teacher realized that it was not "I came, I saw, I conquered," but rather said "I saw, I conquered, I came," the teacher started laughing. The other teachers asked what was so funny. After they had a good laugh, they realized that it was too funny and indecent, and decided that our organization should be outlawed.

All our banners were taken down and our pages were taken out of the yearbook.

More pop music from Egypt: What ever happened to love songs? How about songs about peace? I guess I'll always be on the wrong side of Egyptian pop music...
Egypt Today - The Magazine of Egypt: "He Hates Israel, Too

Meet Islam Khalil, the brains behind ?I Hate Israel? and makwagi crooner Shaaban Abdel Rahim?s other political hits
By Yasmin Moll


MAKWAGI (IRONING MAN) turned pop star Shaaban Abdel Rahim?s new album has many shaking their hips, others reaching for their Brufen and some members of the People?s Assembly so outraged they?ve suggested banning his music for life.
Titled Illi Khayif Yirooh (If You?re Scared, Go), the album has attracted attention both at home and abroad, especially since a video-clip of one of the album?s tracks ? graphically depicting Israeli leader Ariel Sharon as a vampiresque-thug ? began airing on private satellite channels.
The middle-aged shaabi singer ? who once said in a television interview that he likes his suits to match his upholstery ? came into the national spotlight in 2001 with his hit song ?Ana Bakrah Israel (wa baheb Amr Moussa)? ? ?I hate Israel (but I love Amr Moussa)? ? dedicated to the man who was then Egypt?s foreign minister and is now head of the Arab League."

This is the kind of article that I would comment on if I knew how this tech worked...

My Way News

Now this is how I will be posting in the future.