It seems that the existence of the world, the global economy and national security all rely on Jewish Communal Workers being in their offices at all times. This morning when I called the general number at work, the recorded message said, "Due to the weather conditions, the organization's building will open at 10:00."
10:00??? Every school in the area has a Snow Day. We have a Snow Hour. The agency has remote desktop and we have the ability to access Outlook and voicemail from home. So I really don't understand why we should be forced to brave the road conditions or risk loosing a personal day. Then again, I'm not the chief here, I'm just an Indian. Or should I say I'm not the general, I'm just a soldier. (Yeah. That's better, more PC, and more accurate.)
So I got all bundled up with boots and galoshes, and even wore jeans, but I brought slacks with me, since jeans are not allowed according to the dress code. I decided to take the local roads to work because of the hazardous road conditions. There were so many accidents on Route 80 that the traffic reports didn't say
where they were, they just reported
how many. I stopped for gas on my way to work. "Fill it up. Regular. Credit" I reached into my pocket to take out my debit card, and realized that my wallet was not there. Two pairs of pants but no wallet! In all the confusion, I left my wallet at home. So I drove back, picked up my wallet and started out again.
I got to work at, like 11:30. I trudged in like Mennu of the North with my puffy coat, ratty scarf and golden shades. The woman at the reception area said the building was closing at 3:00. Good thing I was there!
When I got to my desk, I saw that I had a voice mail message. It was my colleague from Rochester. He said they had 27 inches of snow, and counting, but they still had to come in to work. Every school was cancelled in Rochester, but he had to be at work. It sounded very familiar to me. He was just calling around to see who else was in the same boat. He told me that they had a meeting yesterday to discuss whether they should cancel programs or not. I think it’s a no brainer: parents who send their children to these programs don’t think, “Gee! We really should bring little Shmully to the program even though there’s 27 inches of snow…”
Anyhow, I found an email in my box from one of the human resources demons saying that there’s a lunch meeting at 12:30. At first I thought, “Lunch! I like lunch. How nice!” Then I thought about what the possible subject could be, and that caused me concern. So I decided that I should put on the slacks that I brought so I wouldn’t be in violation of the dress code. As I finished putting on my pants, and was about to head to the lunch thing, one of my colleagues told me that our agency wasn’t invited for lunch. And to think, I changed my pants for nothing!
Then my boss rolled by my office and tells me to hang up my coat. “Joker,” I thought. I haven’t had a coat hook since my second day at the job. I sent repeated requests to facilities for a coat hook, all of which were unheeded. My boss even sent a few. But today, finally, after six months of being on the job, I got my coat hook!
“Happy birthday,” my boss said. I jumped out of my chair to see the shiny new coat hook on the back of my door.
As I hung up my coat, I had a kind-of-Borat-like moment. “Ha ha ha. Look at me. I am hanging my coat up on a coat hook! Look how fancy I am! Just like royalty! The king and his coat hook! It’s nice.”
To anyone who was brave enough to drive to work today, I salute you! Have a safe ride home!
This picture was taken with an iPhone on August 5, 2007. I was bopping around the city with some friends who used to live in New York. I had just recieved a phone call from my nephew, who was experiencing culture shock upon his return to Memphis. He asked where I was. I said, "Houston Street."
(or as I like to call it: Allapalooza)
